By Neil Oram


When I was pretending to be a little boy I would time to time ask the big people pretending to be grown ups for odd bits of information…because I was feeling fearful…full of doubt…insecure.


And now many years later I still ask adults for information because I still …FEEL insecure.


I’ve come to the conclusion that ‘the spirit of PLAY is very rare in human discourse. Who-man discourse. You-man discourse. Wanting to be RIGHT—which of course is the same as taking one’s IDEA OF ONESELF very obsessively—appears to my mind to be just about omnipresent.



Of course, being playful is NOT the same as takingt the piss.. Taking the piss is an expression of an ATTITUDE.


All attitudes are angles. And being HELD by any angle implies being crystal-eyesd. A sort of SELF-crude-see-fiction. Perpetual self-crucifiction.


The Spirit of PLAYING is not a crystallizing agency.


Am I coming through?


It appears that by the TIME most have reached the end of their teens they have become crystallized into an emotional/mental angle. Becoming an AGENT for one’s own constructed attitude is the perfect condition for producing omnipresent toxic pollution. Rampant egotism is only a particular vapour within this entropy assisted poisonous atmosphere.


Once one has become an agent for an attitude…so called ‘daily life’ is determined by the servitude  to the  voracious attitude. The tone of voice, the vocabulary, the clothes worn or not worn, the sounds listened to, jobs endured or enjoyed, what is accepted or rejected, friends and enemies, places where lives, the general state of so called ‘mental health’. In fact everything experienced is an imprecise effect of the self-constructed crystal-eyesd ATTITUDE.


Being SLAVES of this condition , endless simulation of real psychological freedom is thrust upon each other without mercy.


To avoid the self-confrontation  with one’s own self-inflicted slavery, slaves enslave other self-defeating slaves.


I don’t care what any slave of these deadening occupations call their various forms of imprisonment. Meant.


I  say euphemism is a very popular psychological deodorant.


Of course there are many, many factors which contribute to beings becoming agents for AN ANGLE on ‘existence’. Because the crystallized attitudes adopted or constructed occurs within a period of relative psychological fluidity, the attitudes are held to be highly valuable creations. Works of art. Psychological art. The making of a self. ME. I’ll say it again! ME. I A viewpoint attracting massive (emotional) mental/ physical NOISE and energy wastage. Yet this omnipresent stupidity is developed when youngsters are existing within the period of their greatest creative potential.


Is ‘tragic’ the right word? Tragic farce?


It’s of no use saying that it’s the  consequence of being SHAPED by circumstances. You can’t ‘change ‘the stripes of the tiger’ and all that. We just kill  them or domesticate them. Most are killed off with internal claustrophobia. Justified resentment. Re-sent-meant. Resent to where? To the soul’s Coventry. Perfect polite passivity.


So…once a youngster has become a robot is that it?


Once a crowd has become a Nation…a State…can ‘the Spirit of PLAYING’ roam at will?


Can an agent—pulled or driven—ever become ALIVE? Totally ALIVE?


This means…can a crystallized attitude be melted down?


You may be a very attractive frost-flower…with great pulling powers…but to maintain your persuasive presentation(s)…you have to be on your very best guard against any intrusion of (merciless) SUNLIGHT. Warmth. Real WARMTH  has to be diligently AVOIDED. It’s part of the contract of being an agent for deadness. Cynicism.


Is self-hatred a useful approach to a potential de-construction of a crystal-eyesd attitude? No, dissatisfaction with the constraints of being a wet robot will never do it! A sense of dissatisfaction with robotic existence is part of the wet robot’s software.


Changing one’s job, one’s partner(s), one’s form of drug, one’s place of residence, one’s clothes, food, friends, reading material, films one sees…none of any of this is going to do it.


The addiction to concealed dishonesty is too subtle for the agent to SEE. SEE. SEE.


Yes SEEING the total non-confessed dependence on self-deception is a required beginning.


Of course I’m talking about addiction. Addiction to spiritual passivity. To psychological negativity. WELL CONCEALED psychological negativity. A pretence at being an individual…when in fact there is NOTHING there but divided and divided and divided views. Reflections upon the many faceted crystallized attitude.


Dear, dear…how the trivial distractions are trumpeted whilst the deadening dis-ease of egotism is continuously fed. FED.



So…SEEING…one’s cleverly disguised addiction to deadness is a brave start. That might take some doing. Or should I say some ‘sustained AWAKE-NESS’?


Well that’s about it…except I forgot to mention that the omnipresent addiction to falsity includes the ‘feeling’ of being OWNED by others…which of course means being owned by the sense of a scarcity of TIME.